Author: Anonymous Page 76

Advice: Something which we give by the bushel but take by the grain.

Definitions

He's so thin he had to stand twice in the same place to make a shadow.

Miscellaneous

Cut the biblical cord.

Malaprops

Unabated: A fishhook without a worm.

Definitions

Both of my children had the chicken pops when they were young.

Health Malaprops

An Englishman considers himself a self-made man, and thereby relieves the Almighty of a dreadful responsibility.

England People Places

He’s so crooked that when he dies, they’re going to have to screw him into the ground.

Characteristics Expressions Honesty

Fettuccine Alfredo: Macaroni and cheese for adults.

Cooking Definitions Food/Drink

She tried to use reverse psychiatry on me.

Malaprops

“I’ve been to a film festival in Southern France,” said Tom cannily.

Tom Swifties

Auditor: A person who goes in after the war is lost to bayonet the wounded.

Definitions Occupations

He really grates me up the wrong way.

Mixed metaphors

I understand that Congress has taken the first step in the fight against air pollution: limiting the speeches to five minutes.

Congress Government

“I wonder where the next character is going to appear,” said Tom with a cursory glance.

Tom Swifties

Liberal: One who tolerates all beliefs and opinions except those with which he disagrees.

Beliefs Definitions

Wig: A convertible top.

Appearance Definitions Hair

Calorie: Basic measure of the amount of rationalization offered by the average individual prior to taking a second helping of a particular food.

Definitions Food/Drink

Flashlight: A case for storing dead batteries.

Definitions Things

Tact: The ability to describe others as they see themselves.

Definitions

As we consider the road that unfolds before us.

Mixed metaphors

Do not argue with an idiot; he/she will drag you down to his/her level and beat you with experience.

Fools Intelligence People