Author: Anonymous Page 78

If a job’s worth doing, make sure you delegate it to the right person.

It's on the tip of my frontal lobotomy.

“I wish I had something to write with,” Tom said pensively.

“There’s a high charge for supporters traveling by coach,” said Tom with considerable fanfare.

Candidate: A person who asks for money from the wealthy and votes from the poor to protect them from each other.

That's putting the chicken before the cart.

“I think I’ll use a different font,” said Tom boldly.

Too many skeletons in her background

Politeness: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

“What are these berries?” Tom rasped.

Racehorse: A barn athlete.

He could wear a top hat and walk under a snake’s belly.

Desk: A dangerous place from which to view the world.

Barber: A brilliant conversationalist who cuts hair for a sideline.

Nepotism: Putting on heirs.

Small Town: Where everybody knows what everybody else is doing, and all buy the weekly newspaper to see how much the editor dares to print.

The lining's always more silver on the other side of the cloud.

… just to relieve the monopoly.

Abdicate: To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

Rattle some feathers.