Author: Anonymous Page 81

Busier than a puppy in room full of rubber balls.

Expressions

Cross-Eyed Teacher: A teacher that loses control over his or her pupils.

Definitions

Freelance: To collect unemployment.

Definitions Work

Chicken guarding the hen house

Mixed metaphors

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it.

Definitions Food/Drink

Deep pockets… short arms

Expressions

If winners never quit, and quitters never win, what idiot came up with quit while you're ahead?

People Situations

Antique Shop: A junk store that has raised its prices.

Definitions

He’s not only turning grey, he has a receiving hairline!

Malaprops

Happier than a pig in slop

Emotions Expressions Happiness

Sport: War without killing.

Definitions

The trouble with most marriages is after she says ‘I do’, she won’t.

Marriage

You’re fighting upstream.

Mixed metaphors

Tabloid: A screamlined newspaper.

Communication Definitions Reading/Writing

Housewarming: The last call for wedding presents.

Definitions

Alcatraz: A pen with a lifetime guarantee.

Definitions Wordplay

Woman: A creature who is either making a fool out of man, or making a man out of a fool.

Definitions People

You can’t go in there cold turkey with egg on your face.

Mixed metaphors

In the nineteenth century, life was hard for Europe’s pheasants.

Malaprops People Poverty

So crosseyed, she could look at her own head.

Appearance Expressions

Gardener: Someone who thinks that what goes down must come up.

Definitions