Author: Anonymous Page 87

Raising kids is like being pecked to death by a chicken.

Children Expressions Family

My uncle died of Lou Sterrett's disease.

Health Malaprops

Good Neighbor: One who makes his noise at the same time you make yours.

Definitions

Acupuncture: Waiting for a cure on pins and needles.

Miscellaneous

Isn't it nice to not have to look over our backs anymore?

Mixed metaphors

Civilization: A process whereby one generation finds the questions to the previous generation’s answers.

Definitions

Congress: A body of men brought together to slow down the government.

Congress Definitions Government

Automation takes more people to correct the mistakes.

Mistakes Problems

I think sex is better than logic, but I can't prove it.

Sex

Long road to hoe.

Mixed metaphors

You are so lazy if you had a third hand, you’d need a third pocket to put it in.

Characteristics Expressions

Yawn: An honest opinion openly expressed.

Definitions Opinion

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Communication Situations Speech

An ideal mind is the devil's playground.

Misspokements

Intuition: The strange instinct that tells a woman she is right whether she is or not.

Definitions Women

Historians: People who won’t let bygones be bygones.

Definitions History Occupations Time

It's so far removed, it goes right over our heads.

Mixed metaphors

It's a long road to hoe

Malaprops

Half the people you know are below average.

Characteristics People

She has really plummeted to the top of the charts.

Malaprops

Ugly as stump full of spiders.

Appearance Expressions Ugly