Author: Anonymous Page 96

Rummage Sale: Where you buy stuff from somebody else’s attic to store in your own.

She’s a tall drink of water.

Those people all corregated over there.

“My wife is cheating on me,” Tom cackled.

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

It's time to swallow the bullet.

Take the ball by the horns and run with it.

Bachelor: One who treats all women as sequels.

You could just charm the dew off of a honey suckle.

“I need an injection,” Tom pleaded in vain.

All's well that ends.

Marriages are made in heaven, maybe that’s why so many atheists fool around.

Science Fiction: Fairy tales for nerds.

Freudian Slip: When you say one thing but mean your mother.

Don't count your chickens until you see the whites of their eyes.

Acoustic: An instrument used in shooting pool.

Zircon: A diamond falsie.

Accountant: Someone hired to explain that you didn’t make the money you did.

Neurotic: Someone who worries about things that didn’t happen in the past instead of worrying about things that won’t happen in the future.

Convict: The only person who likes to be stopped in the middle of a sentence.

“I won’t buy a circuit breaker,” Tom refused.