Author: Anonymous Page 96

“You have the right to remain silent,” said Tom arrestingly.

Diet: A system of starving yourself to death so you can live a little longer.

Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.

Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids.

Conscience: An inner voice that warns us somebody is watching.

Childish Games: Those at which your wife beats you.

Constant change is here to stay.

“I couldn’t believe there were 527,986 bees in the swarm!” Tom recounted.

Time rolled up like a scroll, while the plague nibbled at the edges of their years.

You can’t have your hill and die on it too.

I’d like to have a kid, but I’m not sure I’m ready to spend ten years of my life constantly asking someone where his shoes are.

I'm sweating like a bullet.

That sure did take the steam out of his sails.

“I caught two hares”, said Tom abrasively.

Hey, watch this!

I could hear footprints.

She has bigger dogs to fry.

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.

Some folks are so highly educated they can bore you on any subject.

It looks like the cows have come home to roost.

Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of.