Author: Anonymous Page 98

Forger: A man who made a name for himself.

“I’m from Missouri,” Tom stated.

Self-made Man: A horrible example of unskilled labor.

It is so hot… chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.

Teenagers: Those old enough to know everything.

Philosophers: People who talk about something they don’t understand, and make you think it’s your fault.

Conference: An organized way of postponing a decision.

Bisexual: A person who pays for sex.

She is so old… she's in God's year book.

“We had trouble with the propulsion systems for those moon flights”, said the NASA engineer apologetically.

He reads like a fish.

The discovery of the preserved bodies “breathed new life into” Arctic exploration.

Quit spitting on the handle and get to hoeing.

An apple a day doesn’t from the tree.

Intelligent conversationalist: One who nods his head in agreement while you’re talking.

You’ve really put your finger on the nail there.

He’d steal flies from a blind spider.

Puritan: A person who pours righteous indignation into the wrong things.

He was as mad as a mule chewing on bumblebees!

“Your tears simply do not affect me,” he observed dryly.

To make the drawers work better, rub them with paraphernalia.