Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Classified ad Page 5
Foot tasting, [sic] arranged through the courtesy of Marks & Spencers and Safeway, gives customers a rare chance to try some of those more exotic flavors.
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Nags Head Shopping Centre NC
PROVED! Make Bedwetting Easier… Waterproof Mattress Protector $19.95
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CORRECTION – In a recipe for salsa published recently, on of the ingredients was misstated… The correct ingredient is “2 tsp. of cilantro” instead of “2 tsp. of cement.”
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Illiterate? Write today for free help.
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Lost: small brown poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
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LOST African Elephant. Call 281-701-….
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Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
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No matter what your top coat is made of, this miracle spray will make it really repellent.
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Food Stamps Excepted [sic]
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DOWNERS GRTOVE – Stonewall Ave. Sat 10/18 & Sun 10/19 9am – 5pm – Dead Peoples Old Stuff. Oak stenciled table, tools, medical aids, Whirlpool, wheelchair, casino items, beer signs, many collectibles.
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Free internet access … $99.
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Smile of the Week • I’m smiling because “I am going to buy some sheep.” Sonny Clements, Manzanola
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MATH TUDAR NEEDED for Intermediate Algebra, needed ASAP! Call…
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CUSTOMER SERVICE REP – FT/PT Strong phone skills and able to handle high call volume. Light collection. Fast paste work enviorment. Fax resume…
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March 8th – Hypnotist Frank Santos – Donation $10 – All you can eat – Bring your own food – Starts at 8pm…
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JOB OPPORTUNITY IN BROADCASTING – PT Janitor/maintenance-general janitorial, clean, sanitize, dust, polish, spot wash, vacuum, empty trash, gather recyces, replace light bulbs. Send resume to: MARIA ADAMS, KTSH 100 Valley Dr., Brisbane, Ca 94005. Fax 415-467-…. EOE. DEADLINE 4/12/96.
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Super Bowel Party – Sunday January 30th – Complimentary Buffet…
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Sewing-machine mechanic to work in ladies' housecoats. Good wages and working conditions.
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Found: Keys at the Diversion Cam rest stop with fob that says "Keys I Haven't Lost Yet."
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Buy one restraining order, get one free!
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Attorney in Fresno CA
We have a large selection of shirts for both mens and ladies.
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