Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Confucius Page 12
Confucius say… criticism is not nearly as effective as sabotage.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… a bomb goes off in the middle of a herd of cows, there will be udder destruction.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… the only thing divorce proves is whose mother was right in the first place.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… couple who cross LSD with birth control pills, get a trip without the kids.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… diet is a selection of food that makes other people lose weight.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… tight dress is like a barbed fence… it protects the premises without restricting the view.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… honor your personality flaws, for without them, you would have no personality at all.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… if you don't want anyone to get your goat, don't let them know where you have it tied.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… who mix Rogaine with Viagra will end up hard headed.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… fool and his money are soon partners.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… butcher who back into meat grinder get a little behind in his orders.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants!
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… he who light the fuse of love, get big bang.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… never tell a one legged hitch hiker to hop in.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… virginity like balloon… one prick – all gone.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… with one chopstick go hungry.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… forgiveness is cheaper than a lawsuit, but not nearly as gratifying.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man with head up ass, can't see for shit.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… if you don't believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who let woman on top, will screw up.
Confucius
Confucius say
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