Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Thursday, April 3, 2025
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Author: Confucius Page 22
Confucius say… baby conceived in back seat of automatic car grow up to be shiftless bastard.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… learn to masturbate… come in handy.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… if wise man marry, he become otherwise.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… woman who gives away free potato chips, will offer you a free Lay.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… men are like spray paint… one squeeze and they're all over you.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… cow with no legs, ground beef.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… always wear camouflage condoms: They won't see you coming.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… never have sex with a stranger unless you are stranger than them.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… friend is someone who thinks you're a good egg even though you're slightly cracked.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… difference between wives and husbands is: wives want to videotape birth of child, husbands the conception.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… he who places head in sand, will get kicked in the end!
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… good life is like toilet paper… long and useful.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… quietest place in the world is the complaint department at a parachute packing plant.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… woman who dates gambler, gets cheated on.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… may be a fool and not know it… but not if he is married.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… economy will go up and down when country is run by yo-yo's.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… sex on beach is like American beer… very near water.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… some fisherman catch their fish by the tale.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… woman who goes to man's apartment for snack, may get tit bit.
Confucius
Confucius say
Page 22 of 28
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