Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
Home
About
Categories
Activities
Age
Animals
Appearance
Beliefs
Characteristics
Communication
Conflict
Death
Education
Emotions
Entertainment
Family
Food/Drink
Government
Health
Intelligence
Life
Marriage
Miscellaneous
Money
People
Places
Problems
Relationships
Science/Weather
Sex
Situations
Sports
Success
Things
Time
Work
Additional Categories
Book Titles
Confucius say
Definitions
Epitaphs
Exaggerations
Expressions
Hollywood Squares
Insults
Last Words
Murphy's Laws
Place Names
Proverbs
Reviews/Criticism
Song Titles
Tom Swifties
TV/Movie Quotes
Oops...
Bushisms
Church Bulletins
Classified Ads
Colemanballs
Headlines
Malaprops
Misspokements
Signs
Translations
Yogi-isms
Some Popular Authors
Abraham Lincoln
Alfred E. Neuman
Ambrose Bierce
Benjamin Franklin
Dave Barry
Demetri Martin
Dorothy Parker
Emo Phillips
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
H.L. Mencken
Homer Simpson
Jeff Foxworthy
Jimmy Carr
Joan Rivers
Mae West
Mark Twain
Mitch Hedberg
Oscar Wilde
Phyllis Diller
Richard Lewis
Rita Rudner
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
Stewart Francis
W.C. Fields
Will Rogers
Woody Allen
View All Authors
Author: Confucius Page 26
Confucius say… drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… if you can't be content with what you have received, be thankful for what you have escaped.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who fish in other man’s well often catch crabs.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… men are like cement… after getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… is better to lose a lover than love a loser.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… worm that falls asleep in King Arthur’s apple will wake up in middle of knight.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… many arguments have two sides, but no end.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who is impotent will have Willy-nilly.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… your strength lies in your continued belief that what you just ate was indeed duck.
Confucius
Confucius say
Fortune cookies
Confucius say… tattoo is permanent proof of temporary insanity.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… there is no future in writing history books.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… impotent loser is a man who can't even get his hopes up.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… first breathe of love is last breath of wisdom.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… difference between pink and purple, is your grip.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who masturbate only screwing himself.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… grease monkey who go to bed without bathing wake up oily in the morning.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… schoolboy who plays with schoolgirl during wrong period get caught red-handed.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… to make long story short… don't tell it.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who date flat chested woman will be feeling low.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… if you want your dreams to come true, don't oversleep.
Confucius
Confucius say
Page 26 of 28
« First
« Previous
24
25
26
27
28
Next »