Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
Home
About
Thursday, April 3, 2025
Categories
Activities
Age
Animals
Appearance
Beliefs
Characteristics
Communication
Conflict
Death
Education
Emotions
Entertainment
Family
Food/Drink
Government
Health
Intelligence
Life
Marriage
Miscellaneous
Money
People
Places
Problems
Relationships
Science/Weather
Sex
Situations
Sports
Success
Things
Time
Work
Additional Categories
Book Titles
Confucius say
Definitions
Epitaphs
Exaggerations
Expressions
Hollywood Squares
Insults
Last Words
Murphy's Laws
Place Names
Proverbs
Reviews/Criticism
Song Titles
Tom Swifties
TV/Movie Quotes
Oops...
Bushisms
Church Bulletins
Classified Ads
Colemanballs
Headlines
Malaprops
Misspokements
Signs
Translations
Yogi-isms
Some Popular Authors
Abraham Lincoln
Alfred E. Neuman
Ambrose Bierce
Benjamin Franklin
Dave Barry
Demetri Martin
Dorothy Parker
Emo Phillips
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
H.L. Mencken
Homer Simpson
Jeff Foxworthy
Jimmy Carr
Joan Rivers
Mae West
Mark Twain
Mitch Hedberg
Oscar Wilde
Phyllis Diller
Richard Lewis
Rita Rudner
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
Stewart Francis
W.C. Fields
Will Rogers
Woody Allen
View All Authors
Author: Confucius Page 27
Confucius say… just one letter makes all the difference between here and there.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… he who stick head in open window get pane in neck.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who put head on railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… forbidden fruits make many jams.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… worst thing a wife can get on her twenty fifth wedding anniversary is morning sickness.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… is better to give than receive – especially advice.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… arch criminal is one who robs shoe stores.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… all men eat, but Fu Manchu.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… wash your face in the morning, neck at night.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… is better to lose a lover than love a loser.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… if the washroom upstairs is occupied, there is a hypotenuse.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… army like blow job… closer to discharge you get, the better it feels.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… butler with no teeth is called an in-dentured servant.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… difference between roast beef and pea soup is that anyone can roast beef.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… wise man makes sure that his wife's birthday cake is short one candle.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… man who put pea in soup very unclean.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… he who light the fuse of love, get big bang.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… Taliban's national bird is duck.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… new wives are like computers… they go down unexpectedly.
Confucius
Confucius say
Confucius say… men are like spray paint… one squeeze and they're all over you.
Confucius
Confucius say
Page 27 of 28
« First
« Previous
24
25
26
27
28
Next »