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humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Country expression Page 15
If she were an inch taller she'd be round.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Overweight
This gravy's so good, if you get it on your forehead your tongue's gonna slap your brains out!
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Uglier than the southbound end of a northbound donkey.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Well, shut my mouth.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Shocked and speechless
Sharp as a ball peen hammer.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
It's raining harder than a cow pissing on a flat rock.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Cows
Other expressions
Rain
Greener than goose shit
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Lacking experience
New
Other expressions
Unripe
Like a polecat at a camp meeting
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Bad
Other expressions
Unwanted
Unwelcome
Pot licker
Country expression
Miscellaneous
A person who lacks ambition
A spiritless mongrel dog - often a nondescript hound mix who’s only value is to lick cooking pots
Other expressions
If that ain't right then grits ain't groceries.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Obviously
Of course
Other expressions
It'd be quicker to train kudzu.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Not easily instructed
Other expressions
I’m so poor that if it cost a nickle to go around the world, I couldn’t get out of sight.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
To beat the band
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Fast
Other expressions
Quickly
Meaner than a sack full of rattlesnakes.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Bad
Meanness
Other expressions
Don’t let your mouth write a check that your ass can’t cash.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Don’t make statements that you can’t back up
Other expressions
You had better go lick that calf over.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
When you didn’t do the job right the first time and sent back to do it again
That boy wouldn’t work in a pie factory, afraid he’d get full and have to quit.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Laziness
Other expressions
Couldn't hit a barn if you were on the inside.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
This likker is just right; if it’d been any worse, I couldn’t have drunk it; if it’d been any better, you wouldn’t have give it to me.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Happy as a hog in slop.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
Let me hug your neck.
Country expression
Miscellaneous
Other expressions
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