Author: Epitaph Page 11

I am woman here me roar. And boy did she.

Epitaphs

Here lies Dead Tom

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Curly – Joe DeRita, “The Last Stooge” July 12, 1909 – July 3, 1993

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Here lies Donald and his wife Janett McPhee, aged 40 he and 30 she.

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Here lieth, underneath these stones, The Beard, the Flesh, and eke the Bones Of Wrexham's Clerk, old Daniel Jones.

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Here lies the body of Jane Gordon. With mouth almighty and teeth accordin!

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Sudden and unexpected was the end – Of our esteemed and beloved friend, – He gave to all his friends a sudden shock – By one day falling into Sunderland dock.

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Hi! – Stay high – Bye

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He is not here – But only his pod; He shelled out his peas – And went to his God.

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Under this stone Lies Billy Joe Bob Stealing chickens Was his last job

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Here richly, with ridiculous display, the politician’s corpse was laid away. While all of his acquaintance sneered and slanged, I wept: for I had longed to see him hanged.

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This stone was raised by Frieda's Lord, not Frieda's virtues to record, for they are known to all the town. This stone was raised to keep her down.

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Here lies Charles. Had six guns Needed seven. Now he is in heaven

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This debt I owe is justly due, and I am come to sleep with you.

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Here lies Bernard Lightfoot who was accidentally killed in his forty fifth year.

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Snug

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Here lies Fred, Who was alive and is dead: Had it been his father, I had much rather; Had it been his brother, Still better than another; Had it been his sister, No-one would have missed her; Had it been the whole generation, So much better for the nation. But since 'tis only Fred, Who was alive and is dead, here's no more to be said.

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My wife lies here. All my tears cannot bring her back, Therefore, I weep.

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Ashes to ashes dust to dust, here lies George Emery I trust. And when the trump blows louder and louder, he’ll rise a box of Emery powder.

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Eliza, sorrowing rears this marble slab to her dear John who died of eating crab.

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The land I cleared is now my grave. Think well, my friends, how you behave

Epitaphs