Author: Epitaph Page 15

I started out in life with the idea, that the world had an opening for me. And it did.

Epitaphs

Dear God: enclosed, please find Rube Goldberg. Now that you’ve got him, what are you going to do with him?

Epitaphs

A rum cough carried him off.

Epitaphs

Here lies my wife, here lies she; Hallelujah! Hallelujee!

Epitaphs

John Edwards who perished in a fire. None could hold a candle to him.

Epitaphs

I put my wife beneath this stone, for her repose and for my own.

Epitaphs

Here lies Gilles. He used no net, Knew no fear. He made a misstep And wound up here

Epitaphs

There once was a man named Don, who fell asleep out on his lawn. They thought he was pretending to be dead, then a tombstone fell on his head. And now Don is long gone.

Epitaphs

The body that lies buried here – By lightning fell, death's sacrifice, – To him Elijah's fate was given – He rode on flames of fire to heaven.

Epitaphs

While on earth my knee was lame, I had to nurse and heed it. But now I’m at a better place, where I don’t even need it.

Epitaphs

Exit Burbridge

Epitaphs

I’m A Writer But Then Nobody’s Perfect

Epitaphs

This is the grave of Mike O’Day, who died maintaining his right of way. His right was clear, his will was strong, but he’s just as dead as if he’d been wrong.

Epitaphs

Some have children, others none, Here lies the mother of twenty one.

Epitaphs

To the memory of David Wall – Whose superior performance on the bassoon endeared him to an extensive musical acquaintance. His social life closed on the 4th Dec. 1796. in his 57th year.

Epitaphs

None of us ever voted for Roosevelt or Truman

Epitaphs

Rest In Peace Cousin Huet – We all know you didn't do it

Epitaphs

Here lies the landlord Tommy Dent – In his last cosy tenement.

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Heave a sigh For old John Doak. He didn't know His brakes were broke

Epitaphs

The Lord saw good; I was lopping off wood, and down fell from the tree; I met with a check, and I broke my neck, and so Death lopped off me.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Thomas Kemp, Who lived by wool and died by hemp

Epitaphs