Author: Epitaph Page 21

Here lies Elizabeth, my wife for 47 years, and this is the first damn thing she ever done to oblige me.

Epitaphs

Rab McBeth – who died for the want of another breath.

Epitaphs

Reader if cash thou are – In want of any – dig 4 feet deep – And thou wilt find a Penny.

Epitaphs

Susan Tomkins here she lies, nobody laughs and nobody crys, where shes gone or how she fares nobody knows and nobody cares

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Here I at length repose, My spirit now at aise is; With the tips of my toes And the point of my nose Turned up to the roots of the daisies.

Epitaphs

Here lies John Hill, a man of skill. His age was five times ten, he ne'er did good, nor ever would, had he lived as long again.

Epitaphs

I am woman here me roar. And boy did she.

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Until the brakes are turned on time, – Life's throttle-valve shut down. – He works to pilot in the crew – That wears the martyr's crown. – On schedule time, on upper grade – Along the homeward section. – He lands his train in God's roundhouse – The mom of resurrection. – His time is full, no wages docked, – His name on God's pay roll. – And transportation through to Heaven – A free pass for his soul.

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Well this was fun, let's dit again sometime.

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None of us ever voted for Roosevelt or Truman

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She was never meant to be understood, just loved.

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Here Betsy Brown her body lies. Her soul is flying in the skies. While here on earth she oftimes spun six hundred skeins from sun to sun, and wove one day, her daughter brags, two hundred pounds of carpet rags.

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… With patience wait perforce to die And in a short time you'll come to I.

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Here lies Dr Keene, the good Bishop of Chester, who eat up a fat goose, but could not digest her.

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Shall all we die? We shall die all. All die shall we? Die all we shall.

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Elizabeth Scott lies buried here, She was born Nov 20th 1785, according to the best of her recollection.

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Good friends for Jesus' sake forbear – To stir the dust enclosed here. – Blest be the man who spares these stones – And cursed be he who moves my bones.

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Ellen Shannon age 26 years, Who was fatally burned March 21, 1870 by the explosion of a lamp filled with "R. E. Danforth's Non-Explosive-Burning Fluid."

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Who lies here ? — Who do you think? 'Tis poor Will Gibson — give him a drink. Give him a drink, I'll tell you for why, when he was living, he always was dry.

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Charlie was a chemist, but Charlie is no more. What Charlie thought was H20 was H2SO4.

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Here lies old Caleb Ham, by trade a bum. When de died the devil cried, Come, Caleb, come.

Epitaphs