Author: Epitaph Page 24

Here's to Johnny quite a guy. Very sad he had to die. All was well could not be better, Till he wrote my girl a letter.

Conflict Epitaphs Girlfriends Killing

I made an ash of myself

Epitaphs

Reader, I've left this world, in which I had a world to do; sweating and fretting to get rich: just such a fool as you.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Jane Gordon. With mouth almighty and teeth accordin!

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of old Uncle David, who died in the hope of being saved. Where he's gone or how he fares, nobody knows and nobody cares.

Epitaphs

Elizabeth Scott lies buried here, She was born Nov 20th 1785, according to the best of her recollection.

Epitaphs

Here lies one Wood enclosed in wood. One Wood within another. The outer wood Is very good: we cannot praise the other.

Epitaphs

Here lie the bones of Joseph Jones who ate while he was able. But once overfed, he dropt down dead and fell beneath the table. When from the tomb, to meet his doom, he arises amidst sinners. Since he must dwell in heaven or hell, take him – whichever gives the best dinners.

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Here lie I, Martin Elginbrodde: Hae mercy o' my soul, Lord God; As I wad do, were I Lord God, And ye were Martin Elginbrodde.

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Here lies the body of Sarah Sexton – She was a wife that never vexed one. – But I can't say as much for the one at the next stone.

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Here lies the body of Mary Ann Lowder. She burst while drinking a Seidlitz powder. Called from this world to her heavenly rest, she should have waited till it effervesced.

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Here lies Ned. There is nothing more to be said, because we like to speak well of the dead. I came into this world without my consent, and left in the same manner.

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Come blooming youths, as you pass by, And on these lines do cast an eye. As you are now, so once was I; As I am now, so must you be; Prepare for death and follow me.

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Ruth and Johnny, Side by side, Went out for an auto ride, They hit a bump. Ruth hit a tree, And John kept going – Ruthlessly.

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This tombstone is a milestone – Hah! how so? – Because beneath lies Miles – Who's Miles below; – A little man he was, a dwarf in size, – But now stretch’d out, at least Miles long he lies. – His grave though small, contains a space so wide, – It has Miles in breadth, and Miles in length beside.

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Cast a cold eye on life, on death. Horseman, pass by!

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Here lies Elizabeth, my wife for 47 years, and this is the first damn thing she ever done to oblige me.

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Once I wasn't – then I was. Now I ain't again.

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Here lies Dr Keene, the good Bishop of Chester, who eat up a fat goose, but could not digest her.

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To the memory of Ric Richards who by a gangrene first lost a toe, then a leg and lastly his life.

Epitaphs

Richard Kell Munson (1924-2004) Lovingly Known As Doctor Dick

Epitaphs