Author: Epitaph Page 24

Here lies Martin Elmrod. Have mercy on my soul, good God, as I would do were I Lord God, and you were Martin Elmrod.

Epitaphs

OOPS!, he died – Love from us your father, Tom jr. and Mary

Epitaphs

Mary, Mary, quite contrary How does your garden grow? Quite well, I bet, Since it's well fed By her body decomposing below.

Epitaphs

Here lie I and my three daughters, All from drinking the Cheltenham waters. While if we had kept to the Epsom salts, We should not now be in these here vaults.

Epitaphs

Here lies the corpse of Doctor Chard, who fill'd half of this churchyard.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Johnny Haskell, A lying, thieving, cheating rascal; He always lied, and now he lies, He has no soul and cannot rise.

Epitaphs

Here lies Bryan Wilkinson – The doc said he'd be 'alright,’ Guess doc was all wrong

Epitaphs

Beneath this stone, in hopes of Zion, doth lie the landlord of the lion; his son keeps on the business still, resigned unto the heavenly will.

Epitaphs

This is all that remains of poor Ben Hough. He had forty-nine years and that was enough. Of worldly goods he had his share, And now he's gone to the Devil's snare.

Epitaphs

Here lies a man that was Knott born, His father was Knott before him, He lived Knott, and did Knott die, Yet underneath this stone doth lie.

Epitaphs

Sacred to the remains of Jonathan Thompson. A pious Christian and affectionate husband. His disconsolate widow continues to carry on his grocery business At the old stand on Main Street: Cheapest and best prices in town.

Epitaphs

Here lies Fred, Who was alive and is dead: Had it been his father, I had much rather; Had it been his brother, Still better than another; Had it been his sister, No-one would have missed her; Had it been the whole generation, So much better for the nation. But since 'tis only Fred, Who was alive and is dead, here's no more to be said.

Epitaphs

Mitchell – Well This Sucks

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Samuel Gardner was blind in one eye and in a moment of confusion he stepped out of a receiving and discharging door in one of the warehouses into the ineffable glories of the celestial sphere.

Epitaphs

G. Winch, the brewer, lies buried here. In life he was both hale and stout. Death brought him to his bitter bier. Now in heaven he hops about.

Epitaphs

Ingenious youth, thou art laid in dust. Thy friends, for thee, in tears did burst.

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Martha and I together lived – Just two years and a half; – She went first, and I followed after – the cow before the calf.

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Little Johnny had a purple monkey, climbing up a yellow stick, little Johnny licked the purple paint of and it made him deathly sick. They stirred him up with calomel, they tried to move his liver, but all in vain, his little soul was wafted o'er the River.

Epitaphs

H. L. Mencken 1880 – 1956 – If after I depart this vale you ever remember me and have thought to please my ghost, forgive some sinner, and wink your eye at some homely girl

Epitaphs

Fair maiden Lilliard – lies under this stane – little was her stature – but muckle was her fame – upon the English loons – she laid monie thumps – and when her legs were cuttit off – she fought upon her stumps.

Epitaphs

Those who cared for him while living, will know whose body is buried here, to others it does not matter.

Epitaphs