Author: Epitaph Page 26

School is out. Teacher Has gone home

Epitaphs

Where did everybody go?

Epitaphs

 Here lies the body of Dr Hayward, a man who never voted. Of such is the kingdom of Heaven.

Epitaphs

Rich born, rich bred, yet Fate adverse, his wealth and fortune did reverse. He lived and died immensely poor, July the tenth aged ninety-four.

Epitaphs

Reader if cash thou are – In want of any – dig 4 feet deep – And thou wilt find a Penny.

Epitaphs

I would – rather be here – than in Texas.

Epitaphs

Behold! I come as a thief. – Death loves a shining mark. – In this case he had it.

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Dinah had a little can, 'Twas filled with kerosine. And soon among the twinkling stars – Dynamite Benzine.

Epitaphs

Open, open wide ye golden gates that lead to the heavenly shore. Our father suffered in passing through and mother weighs much more.

Epitaphs

In Memory of Jacob, third son of Capt. Jacob Rice, died May 7, 1818 Et. 9 yrs. – His death was occasioned by the fall of a dung fork, one tine penetrating his brain.

Epitaphs

Here lies a man never beat by a plan, straight was his aim and sure of his game, never was a lover but invented a revolver.

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This wasn’t my idea

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A peerless matron, pride of female life In every state, as widow, maid, or wife; who wedded, to threescore preserved her fame. She lived a phoenix, and expired in flame.

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See how God works his wonders now and then, here lies a lawyer, and an honest man.

Epitaphs

Sacred to the memory of William Skaradon who came to his death by being shot with a Colts revolver, one of the old kind brass mounted and of such is the kingdom of heaven.

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A zealous locksmith died of late, and did not enter Heaven’s gate. But stood without and would not knock , because he meant to pick the lock.

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He looked for gold and died of lead poison

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This Ain’t Bad _____ Once You Get Used To It

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It is so soon that I am done for, I wonder what I was begun for.

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“I’m just resting my eyes”

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Dear Lemuel Willard Died in 1821 – When present useful, absent wanted – Lived respected, died lamented.

Epitaphs