Author: Epitaph Page 5

Underneath this ancient pew, lie the remains of Jonathan Blue; his name was Black, but that wouldn't do.

Epitaphs

Here lays Butch. We planted him raw. He was quick on the trigger – But slow on the draw.

Epitaphs

Poor John Scott is buried here, tho' once he was both hale and stout. Death stretched him on his bitter bier, in another world he hops about.

Epitaphs

I'll thank you not to put your butt on my grave.

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Here lies Donnie Cornwell, good and dead. In an extra large coffin to fit his extra large head.

Epitaphs

Hell no! I came here to die not to make a speech!

Epitaphs

In Memory of Jacob, third son of Capt. Jacob Rice, died May 7, 1818 Et. 9 yrs. – His death was occasioned by the fall of a dung fork, one tine penetrating his brain.

Epitaphs

My father and mother were both insane. I inherited the terrible stain. My grandfather, grandmother, Aunts and uncles Were lunatics all And yet died of carbuncles

Epitaphs

Office upstairs.

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Since all that's mortal turns to dust, Reader! be humble and be just; 'Twill ease thy mind of anxious care, and sooth thy passage — God knows where!

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Here I lie, snuck as a bug in a rug – Two rows down in same cemetery – Here I lie, snugger than that other bugger

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Under this yew tree, buried would he be, because his father – he planted this yew tree.

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Sleep soft in dust, wait the Almighty's will, then rise unchanged, and be an angel still.

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… Here lie the bones of Sophie Jones; for her death held no terrors. She was born a maid and died a maid. No hits, no runs, no heirs.

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He has gone to the only place where his own works are excelled.

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Here's to Johnny quite a guy. Very sad he had to die. All was well could not be better, Till he wrote my girl a letter.

Conflict Epitaphs Girlfriends Killing

Beloved Husband of Joan, A Man With Nature, Who Loved Life & His Jigsaws – "Didjabringabeer"

Epitaphs

A Funny Thing Happened

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On the 22nd of June. Jonathan Fiddle Went out of tune.

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HA! HA! I’m Pushing Up Daisies!!!

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Here I lie, taken from life.

Epitaphs