Author: Epitaph Page 8

Here Lies Good Old Fred – A Great Big Rock Fell On His Head – R.I.P.

Epitaphs

He had sand in his craw, But was slow on the draw, So we planted him ‘neath the daisies.

Epitaphs

Here lies old Caleb Ham, by trade a bum. When de died the devil cried, Come, Caleb, come.

Epitaphs

His virtues and his pills are so well known, that envy can’t confine them under stone.

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"May ye be in heaven an hour before the devil knows you're dead"

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Here lies the body Of Margaret Bent. She kicked up her heels And away she went.

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"Lord, thy grace is free, — why not for me?"

And the Lord answered and said, — "Because thy debts aint paid I”

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He called Bill Smith a liar

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John and Lydia, that blooming pair, a whale killed him and her body lies here.

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Don’t Talk So Damn Dumb

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The Lord was good I was lopping off wood – And down fell from a tree. – I met with a check that broke my neck – And so God lopped off me.

Epitaphs

Little Johnny had a purple monkey, climbing up a yellow stick, little Johnny licked the purple paint of and it made him deathly sick. They stirred him up with calomel, they tried to move his liver, but all in vain, his little soul was wafted o'er the River.

Epitaphs

Elizabeth Scott lies buried here, She was born Nov 20th 1785, according to the best of her recollection.

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ASSMAN

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And this is all that’s left of thee , thou fairest of earth’s daughters. Only four pounds of ashes white, out of two hundred and three quarters.

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I will NOT be right back after this message.

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A man of letters it seems was he; the college made him L.L.D. The Order a P.G.W.C. Grim death has given him the G.B., and may his ashes R.I.P.

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The man buried here literally, went to the four winds

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Here lies an Atheist. All dressed up and no place to go.

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Here lies the body of Samuel Proctor, who lived and died without a doctor.

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Here lies the body of Thomas Kemp, Who lived by wool and died by hemp

Epitaphs