Author: Alfred E. Neuman Page 2

In retrospect it becomes clear that hindsight is definitely overrated!

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Intelligence

It takes one to know one – and vice versa!

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Misspokements

Telephone psychics are better at making fortunes than at reading them.

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Money People

Most minds are like concrete… all mixed up and permanently set!

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Intelligence People

If most people said what’s on their minds, they’d be speechless.

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Communication Intelligence Speech

Nowadays, the perfect crime is getting caught and selling your story to T.V.!

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Conflict Crime Entertainment Television

The world is a place that’s gone from being flat to round to crooked.

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Crime Honesty Places World

A family vacation is when you go away with the people you need to get away from.

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Family Relationships

Experience is what makes you pause briefly before going ahead and making the same mistake.

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Mistakes Problems Situations Time

Getting old is when a narrow waist and a broad mind change places!

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Age Appearance Body Old

These days the meaning of a faithful husband is one whose alimony checks arrive on time.

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Husbands Marriage

We are living in a world today where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons.

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Situations Things

A sense of humor is what makes you laugh at something that would make you sore if it happened to you!

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Emotions Laughter

Medical insurance is what allows people to be ill at ease!

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Health Money

Today it takes more brains and effort to make out the income tax form than it does to make the income.

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Government Intelligence Money Taxes

A gossip columnist is someone who uses dirt to make a mountain out of a molehill.

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Communication

The psychiatrist’s office is where you say what you think and be told what you mean.

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Communication Doctors Health

Most people don't act stupid: it's the real thing!

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Fools Intelligence

How come we choose from just two people for president, and fifty for Miss America?

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Government

Good hospitality is making your guests feel at home, even when you wish they were.

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Characteristics Friends Old People

Plenty of people believe in energy conservation – mainly their own.

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Science/Weather