Author: Alfred E. Neuman Page 4

Many a good egg ends up getting beaten.

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Characteristics

In retrospect it becomes clear that hindsight is definitely overrated!

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Intelligence

If people wanted your unsolicited advice, they’d ask for it.

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Beliefs Opinion

It’s not the work that keeps most people from doing volunteer work, it’s the pay!

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Work

Money still talks these days… trouble is, you have to increase the volume alot!

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Death Money Time

If we really learned from our past mistakes, most of us would never get out of bed in the morning.

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Education History Learning Mistakes

The psychiatrist’s office is where you say what you think and be told what you mean.

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Communication Doctors Health

Most minds are like concrete… all mixed up and permanently set!

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Intelligence People

Most people are so lazy, they don't even exercise good judgement!

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Characteristics Exercise Work

A family vacation is when you go away with the people you need to get away from.

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Activities Relationships

America is still a land of promise, especially during a political campaign.

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America Government Places Politics

Crime does not pay… as well as politics.

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Conflict Crime Government Politics

Most wives are like ventriloquists: they stand there nodding while the dummy does all the talking.

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Communication Marriage Speech Wives

A business executive is someone who talks golf in the office and business on the golf course.

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Golf Sports

It takes one to know one – and vice versa!

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Misspokements

Nowadays, an after-dinner mint is what you need to pay the restaurant check.

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Food/Drink Money

All lawyers are cut from the same cloth: fleece.

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Crime Government Law Lawyers

A teacher is someone who talks in our sleep!

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Education Occupations Sleep

Experience is what makes you pause briefly before going ahead and making the same mistake.

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Mistakes Problems Situations Time

Plenty of people believe in energy conservation – mainly their own.

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Science/Weather

The only advantage to living in the past is that the rents are much cheaper!

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Money Past Time