Author: Devin Faraci

There’s a certain irony in having a timeless tale about a man finding his soul being told in the most soulless way possible.

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It’s not complicated… this movie sucks.

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Logic and drama are what get purged here.

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If you’re a Stooges fan, go see the movie. If you like crude, silly slapstick, go see the movie. If you have a stick up your ass, go see Titanic.

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You know those movies that look like they’re going to be really insipid and then completely surprise you? 17 Again isn’t one of those.

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If you were to order 42 at the ballpark you’d get a corndog.

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The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 might be the most beautiful and well made bad film in history.

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A giant turd of a movie that was made because someone had the rights to a brand name and needed to exercise them in a timely manner.

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Year One is so dedicated to being historically accurate that it only uses jokes that are at least two thousand years old.

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A totally stupid movie, Star Trek Into Darkness falls apart as it goes, raining debris as it implodes like a building being demolished.

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Here’s the big mystery of Pittsburgh: How did this movie manage to be so completely terrible?

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Safe House will have you on the edge of your seat – so you can spring out of it the second the credits roll.

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I would accuse American Reunion of being misogynistic, but the movie seems to hold all of humanity in contempt, not just women.

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This film could have been two hours of [Mel] Gibson scanning through microfiche and it wouldn’t have been any more dull.

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I hate The Lone Ranger as much as The Lone Ranger hates The Lone Ranger.

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The most surprising thing about “New Moon,” the second film in the Twilight series, is how much worse it is than the first.

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Jobs ends up being a fairly honest, only mildly bombastic look at the life of a man who was very, very complicated – which is code for ‘a complete a-hole.’

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If Airplane! was Mad Magazine at its absolute best, a real genius work of insanity, Scary Movie 5 is an issue you don’t bother trying to get back after the teacher confiscates it.

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In space no one can hear you yawn.

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[An] utterly incompetent, painfully unfunny, ploddingly dull waste of time, money and life.

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This movie is the definition of a dud, something that just sits inert on screen.

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