Author: Dorothy Parker Page 2

If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Activities Girls People School Sex

Crude is the name of Robert Hyde’s first novel; it is also a criticism of it.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Books Communication Reviews/Criticism

I went to convent in New York and was fired finally for my insistence that the Immaculate Conception was spontaneous combustion.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Situations

The play holds the season’s record, thus far, with a run of four evening performances and one matinée… by an odd coincidence, it ran just five performances too many.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

Where does she find them?

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Insults

An admiring drunk to Parker: I simply can’t bear fools.
Parker: Apparently, your mother did not have the same difficulty.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Fools Intelligence

Seventy-two suburbs in search of a city.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Places

Do me a favor; when you get home, throw your mother a bone.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Family Mothers Situations

You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Intelligence Language People Thinking Women

She looks like something that would eat its young.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Appearance Insults

Because he spills his seed on the ground.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Animals

He’s a writer for the ages… for the ages of four to eight.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Communication Reading/Writing Reviews/Criticism

This is on me.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Death

I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Characteristics Communication Reading/Writing Truth

This book of essays… has all the depth and glitter of a worn dime.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Books Reviews/Criticism

A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Characteristics

Hangover: The wrath of grapes.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Alcohol Food/Drink

The only 'ism' Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Hollywood Places

The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Characteristics Communication

A lady… with all the poise of the Sphinx though but little of her mystery.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

Four be the things I’d been better without;

love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Things