Author: Drew Hastings

Healthy is just a precancerous condition.

(1954 – ) American stand-up comedian
Health

You think of me as narcissistic when actually I'm just oblivious to other people.

(1954 – ) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics People Self

As my mother used to say, ‘You’ll get unconditional love from me when you’ve earned it.

(1954 – ) American stand-up comedian
Emotions Family Mothers Relationships

Did you know that a possum walking through a cornfield sounds exactly like three men with an ax?

(1954 – ) American stand-up comedian
Animals