Author: Frank Zappa

Rock journalism is people who can’t write, interviewing people who can’t talk, in order to provide articles for people who can’t read.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

For the record, folks; I never took a shit on stage and the closest I ever came to eating shit anywhere was at a Holiday Inn buffet in Fayetteville, North Carolina.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

Communism doesn’t work because people like to own stuff.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

Most rock journalism is people who can’t write interviewing people who can’t talk for people who can’t read.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

There is no hell… there is only France.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

Jazz is not dead, it just smells funny.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe; I dispute that… I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline; it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

Art is making something out of nothing and selling it.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

How many people died from the Kama Sutra, as opposed to the Bible?

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

A wise man once said, “Never discuss philosophy or politics in a disco environment.”

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

Watch out where the huskies go, and don’t you eat that yellow snow.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director

When God created Republicans, he gave up on everything else.

(1940 – 1993) composer, guitarist, record producer & film director