Author: Homer Simpson Page 3

My favorite kind of wild animal is on a plate.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Animals TV/Movie Quotes

I never apologize… I’m sorry but that’s the way I am.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Self TV/Movie Quotes

You don't like your job, you don't strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes Work

That horse had better win, or else we're taking a trip to the glue factory… and he won't get to come.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

I've got to get out of this rut and back in the groove.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Life TV/Movie Quotes

I have a great new motivation technique, it is donuts, and the possibility of more donuts.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

Marge, I’m going to miss you so much; and it’s not just the sex; it’s also the food preparation.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

They didn't have any aspirin, so I got you some cigarettes.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

Kids, just because I don't care doesn't mean I'm not listening.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Communication Speech

Marge, every time I learn something new it pushes something old out of my brain. Remember that time I learned how to make wine and forgot how to drive?

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Mind Self TV/Movie Quotes

You can have all the money in the world, but there’s one thing you will never have… a dinosaur.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Money TV/Movie Quotes

When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

Give me liberty or… Ooooo… a jelly donut!

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

You’re everywhere. You’re omnivorous.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Son, when a woman says nothing's wrong, it means everything's wrong; when a woman says everything's wrong, it means everything's wrong; and when a woman says that something isn't funny, you'd better not laugh your ass off!

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
People TV/Movie Quotes Women

If I could say a few words… I would be a better public speaker.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Communication Speech TV/Movie Quotes

Porkchops and bacon, my two favorite animals.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Animals TV/Movie Quotes

If God didn't want us to eat animals, then why'd he make them so tasty?

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Animals TV/Movie Quotes

Everything looks bad if you remember it.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Memory TV/Movie Quotes

Trying is the first step towards failure.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Failure Problems Situations

I want to be alone with my thought.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Intelligence Thinking