Author Homer Simpson | Just-One-Liners.com

Author: Homer Simpson Page 5

Kids, just because I don't care doesn't mean I'm not listening.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

Marge, this ticket doesn't just give me a seat. It also gives me the right, no, the duty, to make a complete ass of myself.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

TV/Movie Quotes

If he's so smart, how come he's dead?

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes

I think I've figured this balloon thing out, Marge. It can go up and down, but not side to side or back in time.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

Things TV/Movie Quotes Balloons

When will I learn? The answer to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle, they’re on TV!

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

Television TV/Movie Quotes

My dreams have been shattered into shards of a broken dream.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

TV/Movie Quotes Ambition Dreams

Marge, try to understand. There are two types of college students, jocks and nerds. As a jock, it is my duty to give nerds a hard time.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

TV/Movie Quotes College students Jocks Nerds

Even communism works… in theory.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

TV/Movie Quotes Communism

Facts are meaningless; you can use facts to prove anything that’s remotely true!

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes Facts

Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes Understanding Apathy

When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

TV/Movie Quotes

I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

Homer Simpson

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)

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Author: Homer Simpson Page 5

Kids, just because I don't care doesn't mean I'm not listening.

Marge, this ticket doesn't just give me a seat. It also gives me the right, no, the duty, to make a complete ass of myself.

If he's so smart, how come he's dead?

I think I've figured this balloon thing out, Marge. It can go up and down, but not side to side or back in time.

When will I learn? The answer to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle, they’re on TV!

My dreams have been shattered into shards of a broken dream.

Marge, try to understand. There are two types of college students, jocks and nerds. As a jock, it is my duty to give nerds a hard time.

Even communism works… in theory.

Facts are meaningless; you can use facts to prove anything that’s remotely true!

Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.

When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something.

I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.