Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Jeff Cesario
Whoever came up with ice fishing must have had the worst marriage on the planet.
Jeff Cesario
(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Marriage
Sports
Ice fishing
I shop at a computer store called 'Your Crap's Already Obsolete.'
Jeff Cesario
(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Science/Weather
Computer store
We have the greatest democracy in the world; of course, you don't have to win the election to become president, but don't nitpick this to death, alright?
Jeff Cesario
(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Democracy
Elections/Voting
Government
President
Democracy
You think it's possible for them to design an electric car that doesn't look like a gay spaceship?
Jeff Cesario
(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Autos
Things
Electric cars
I got the classic Italian male body; I got the ass of a 270-pound man and the chest of a small Romanian gymnast.
Jeff Cesario
(1953 – ) American comedian & writer
Appearance
Body
Italians