Author: Jeff Foxworthy Page 3

You might be a redneck if… you've ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals Dogs People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you have used a bar stool as a walker.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Health People

You might be a redneck if… you can get dog hair from out of your belly button.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals Dogs People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you see a sign that says "Say No To Crack" and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Body Drugs People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… your underwear doubles as your bathing suit.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

You take a normal guy, give him a wife, give them time, and you've got AN IDIOT!

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Fools Husbands Intelligence Marriage Wives

You might be a redneck if… you think a turtleneck is a key ingredient for soup.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Food/Drink People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

Do you know why it's so hard to solve a Redneck murder?… 'cause there's no dental records and all the DNA is the same.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Conflict Killing People Rednecks

Whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Communication Intelligence Speech

It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Insults Wives

You know yer a redneck when you take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you ever named a child after a dog.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Animals Children Dogs Family People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if…… you think that Dom Perignon is a mafia leader.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Food/Drink People

You might be a redneck if… you just bought an 8-track player to put in your truck.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Situations Things

I have never been jealous; not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Characteristics Education Fathers School

You might be a redneck if… you think Taco Bell is the Mexican Phone Company.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you ever won first prize in a tobacco spittin’ contest.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities People Rednecks

If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… you've ever taken an RV to a drive-in movie.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks

You might be a redneck if… three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance Clothing People Rednecks