Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
Home
About
Categories
Activities
Age
Animals
Appearance
Beliefs
Characteristics
Communication
Conflict
Death
Education
Emotions
Entertainment
Family
Food/Drink
Government
Health
Intelligence
Life
Marriage
Miscellaneous
Money
People
Places
Problems
Relationships
Science/Weather
Sex
Situations
Sports
Success
Things
Time
Work
Additional Categories
Book Titles
Confucius say
Definitions
Epitaphs
Exaggerations
Expressions
Hollywood Squares
Insults
Last Words
Murphy's Laws
Place Names
Proverbs
Reviews/Criticism
Song Titles
Tom Swifties
TV/Movie Quotes
Oops...
Bushisms
Church Bulletins
Classified Ads
Colemanballs
Headlines
Malaprops
Misspokements
Signs
Translations
Yogi-isms
Some Popular Authors
Abraham Lincoln
Alfred E. Neuman
Ambrose Bierce
Benjamin Franklin
Dave Barry
Demetri Martin
Dorothy Parker
Emo Phillips
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
H.L. Mencken
Homer Simpson
Jeff Foxworthy
Jimmy Carr
Joan Rivers
Mae West
Mark Twain
Mitch Hedberg
Oscar Wilde
Phyllis Diller
Richard Lewis
Rita Rudner
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
Stewart Francis
W.C. Fields
Will Rogers
Woody Allen
View All Authors
Author: John Daly
Do I have to know rules and all that crap? Then forget it.
John Daly
professional golfer
Golf
Sports
When asked whether he'd like to join the Royal and Ancient Golf Club
I enjoy the oohs! and aahs! from the gallery when I hit my drives; but I'm getting pretty tired of the awws! and uhhs! when I miss the putt.
John Daly
professional golfer
Golf
Sports
I couldn’t care less about all those fiction stories about what happened in the year 1500 or 1600. Half of them aren’t even true.
John Daly
professional golfer
History
Misspokements
Time
I spent $3 million on drink and $3 million on gambling, but I wasted the rest.
John Daly
professional golfer
Golf
Sports
I can tell you one thing. I've done this my way. I don't have anybody to blame for this win but me, and I love it.
John Daly
professional golfer
Golf
Sports
I don't have anywhere to put my elbows when I putt now.
John Daly
professional golfer
Golf
Sports
On how his weight loss affected his game