Author Kathy Lette | Just-One-Liners.com

Author: Kathy Lette

If he wants breakfast in bed, tell him to sleep in the kitchen.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

When you've been around as long as me… you'll know that there are three types of sex… One – brand-new, kitchen-table sex; Two – bedroom sex; then number three – hallway sex… when you pass each other in the hallway and say 'f**k you.’

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Age Sex

Ironic how you can’t get kids out of their beds in the morning but you can’t get them into their beds at night.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Children Family Situations Sleep

People who say that money can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Emotions Happiness Money People Shopping

A balanced meal is whatever stays on the spoon en route to a baby’s mouth.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Children Family Food/Drink

And most men seem to think ‘mutual orgasm’ is an insurance company.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Men People Sex Insurance Mutual orgasm Sex education

Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Husbands Marriage Sex Monogamy

It’s a mystery of parenthood that your son can give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to stray, worm-riddled dogs, share a piece of re-chewed gum from a kid with bronchitis and pick his nose and eat it on a regular basis, yet won’t sit next to his sister because of ‘Girl Germs.’

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Children Family Boys Parenthood

Good art is in the wallet of the beholder.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Art Entertainment Money

Show me a woman with both feet planted firmly on the ground – and I'll show you a girl who can't get her knickers off.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Characteristics People Women

Psychiatry is a waste of good couches; why should I make a psychiatrist laugh, and then pay him?

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Occupations Work Psychiatry

There was no sex education in the ‘70s; we thought the Kama Sutra was Indian takeaway.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Sex 1970s Kama Sutra Sex education

To please a woman in bed, all a man has to do is a poetry course; they also have to learn that the Kama Sutra is not an Indian takeaway and that the mutual orgasm is not an insurance company.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

People Sex Women

Women want to be treated as equals, not sequels.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

People Women

I once dated a famous Aussie rugby player who treated me just like a football; made a pass, played footsie, then dropped me as soon as he’d scored.

Kathy Lette

(1958 – ) Australian author

Dating Men People Relationships

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Author: Kathy Lette

If he wants breakfast in bed, tell him to sleep in the kitchen.

When you've been around as long as me… you'll know that there are three types of sex… One – brand-new, kitchen-table sex; Two – bedroom sex; then number three – hallway sex… when you pass each other in the hallway and say 'f**k you.’

Ironic how you can’t get kids out of their beds in the morning but you can’t get them into their beds at night.

People who say that money can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop.

A balanced meal is whatever stays on the spoon en route to a baby’s mouth.

And most men seem to think ‘mutual orgasm’ is an insurance company.

Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of.

It’s a mystery of parenthood that your son can give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to stray, worm-riddled dogs, share a piece of re-chewed gum from a kid with bronchitis and pick his nose and eat it on a regular basis, yet won’t sit next to his sister because of ‘Girl Germs.’

Good art is in the wallet of the beholder.

Show me a woman with both feet planted firmly on the ground – and I'll show you a girl who can't get her knickers off.

Psychiatry is a waste of good couches; why should I make a psychiatrist laugh, and then pay him?

There was no sex education in the ‘70s; we thought the Kama Sutra was Indian takeaway.

To please a woman in bed, all a man has to do is a poetry course; they also have to learn that the Kama Sutra is not an Indian takeaway and that the mutual orgasm is not an insurance company.

Women want to be treated as equals, not sequels.

I once dated a famous Aussie rugby player who treated me just like a football; made a pass, played footsie, then dropped me as soon as he’d scored.