Author: Leo Rosten

She was as mad as a wet blanket.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Anger Emotions Malaprops

For some not to be martyrs is martyrdom indeed.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
People Situations

I never cease being dumbfounded by the unbelievable things people believe.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Beliefs People

Most men do not mature, they simply grow taller.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Men People

Any man who hates dogs and babies can’t be all bad.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Animals Dogs Emotions People

Any man who hates dogs and babies can’t be all bad.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Animals Dogs Men People

She went into the hospital after being bitten by a spider in a bathing suit.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Language Misspokements

If you are going to do something wrong, at least enjoy it.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Mistakes Problems

Money can’t buy happiness, but neither can poverty.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Money Poverty Wealth

Acting is a form of deception, and actors can mesmerize themselves almost as easily as an audience.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Acting Entertainment

Rosten’s First Law: First-rate people hire first-rate people; second-rate people hire third-rate people.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Murphy’s Laws People Work

From now on I'm watching your every move with a fine-toothed comb.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Mixed metaphors

Anybody who hates dogs and children can’t be all bad.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
People

One of the things you have to say for him: he doesn't mince his punches.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Mixed metaphors

A conservative is one who admires radicals centuries after they're dead.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Beliefs Government Politics

He's the type who will cut your throat behind your back.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Malaprops People

Extremists think “communication” means agreeing with them.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Communication

Not all that shivers is cold.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Malaprops

Satire is focused bitterness.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Communication Language

Rome wasn't burned in a day.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Malaprops

The only reason for being a professional writer is that you can’t help it.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Communication Reading/Writing