Author: Mel Brooks

I've been accused of vulgarity, and I say that's bullshit!

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

The final test of fame is to have a crazy person imagine he is you.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

We Romans are rich. We’ve got a lot of gods. We’ve got a god for everything. The only thing we don’t have a god for is premature ejaculation but I hear that’s coming quickly.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

Presidents don’t do it to their wives; they do it to their country.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

If Shaw and Einstein couldn't beat death, what chance have I got?

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

Peter Marshall: Why are German measles called, German measles?

Mel Brooks: Because late at night, when you’re asleep, they march!

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

Interviewer: You’ve been accused of vulgarity.
Brooks: Bullshit!

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

He who hesitates is poor.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

Critics can’t even make music by rubbing their back legs together.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer

Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer