Author: Morey Amsterdam

A cannibal is a person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter.

(1908 – 1996) actor & comedian
Food/Drink People

Even the police have an unlisted number.

(1908 – 1996) actor & comedian
Government Hollywood Law Things

Peter Marshall: If you see your dog chewing on the grass in your backyard, is that a sign that he’s not feeling well?

Morey Amsterdam: It’s a sign that he doesn’t like the grass in the backyard.

(1908 – 1996) actor & comedian
Hollywood Squares

Peter Marshall: What state is known as The Granite State?

Morey Amsterdam: The Granite State? That’s where the famous man said “Just because your head is made of marble, don’t take everything for granite.”

(1908 – 1996) actor & comedian
Hollywood Squares