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humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Oscar Wilde Page 4
Frank Harris is invited to all of the great houses in England – once.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Insults
Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Activities
Men
People
Women
Advances
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
People
Gutter
Stars
It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics
Money
Income
Interest
She wore far too much rouge last night, and not quite enough clothes; that is always a sign of despair in a woman.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Appearance
I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Individuals
People
Principles
Rugby is a good occasion for keeping thirty bullies far from the center of the city.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Sports
Rugby
Women’s styles may change, but their designs remain the same.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Appearance
Clothing
People
Women
Fashion
Intent
I dislike arguments of any kind; they are always vulgar, and often convincing.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication
Aarguments
Of course, America had often been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
America
Insults
Places
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Individuals
People
Enemies
Football is all very well a good game for rough girls, but not for delicate boys.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Football
Sports
She is a peacock in everything but beauty.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Appearance
Body
Insults
Criticism
Nothing spoils a romance so much as a sense of humor in the woman.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Emotions
Love
Women
Humor
Romance
I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics
Insults
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication
Wordplay
Work
Spoonerism
One should always play fairly when one has the winning cards.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Activities
Characteristics
Games
Fairness
Winning cards
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics
Situations
Temptation
Yield
The Book of Life begins with a man and a woman in a garden… it ends with Revelations.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Beliefs
Books
Communication
Bible
Book of Life
Good intentions are invariably ungrammatical.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Miscellaneous
Good intentions
Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Education
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