Author: P.G. Wodehouse Page 2

A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of someone who had searched for the leak in life’s gas pipe with a lighted candle.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Death

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when."

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Alcohol Appearance Insults

He had just about enough intelligence to open his mouth when he wanted to eat, but certainly no more.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Intelligence

To find a man’s true character, play golf with him.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Golf Sports

The only way of really finding out a man's true character is to play golf with him; in no other walk of life does the cloven hoof so quickly display itself.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Golf Sports

The voice of love seemed to call me… but it was a wrong number.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Emotions Love

Golf… is the infallible test; the man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Golf Honesty Sports

At the age of eleven or thereabouts women acquire a poise and an ability to handle difficult situations which a man, if he is lucky, manages to achieve somewhere in the later seventies.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Characteristics Men People Women

It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Communication

He died of cirrhosis of the liver… it costs money to die of cirrhosis of the liver.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Death Health Money

… I hadn’t the heart to touch my breakfast; I told Jeeves to drink it himself.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Miscellaneous

Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Intelligence Memory

Every author really wants to have letters printed in the papers; unable to make the grade, he drops down a rung of the ladder and writes novels.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Books Communication Reading/Writing