Author: Raul Julia

[The dancer in the cake doesn’t pop out.] Gomez: Was she in the cake before you baked it?

[Lurch hangs his head.]

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

I would die for her. I would kill for her. Either way, what bliss.

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

You'll meet someone… someone very special… someone who won't press charges…

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

I didn’t hate my mother; it was an accident!

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

You are so dashing, you could have any woman you wanted: dead or alive.

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

That’s the spirit, Thing! Lend a hand!

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

Eyes, fingers, toes: two, ten, eleven.

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

To mirth, to merriment… to manslaughter.

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

Morticia: When we first met years ago, it was an evening much like this. Magic in the air. A boy.
Gomez: A girl.
Morticia: An open grave. It was my first funeral.
Gomez: You were so beautiful. Pale and mysterious. No one even looked at the corpse.

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

That poor girl… Lurch, was she in there before you baked?

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

Mr. Buckman: Our Amanda’s already skipped two grades. How about your boy?

Gomez: Probation!

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

I’ve smoked since I was five… mother insisted.

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor

Fester, I hope one day you feel the indescribable joy of having kids, and having someone else raise them.

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor