Author: Rick Bayan Page 3

Fad: A folly committed by enough of the right people to confer upon it the badge of status.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Lawyer: A professional advocate hired to bend the law on behalf of a paying client; for this reason considered the most suitable background for entry into politics.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Government

X-Ray: A diagnostic tool used to detect existing cancerous growths and create new ones for future examinations to reveal.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Health

Lottery: The equivalent of betting that the next pope will be from Duluth, or that the parrot in the pet store window speaks Flemish.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Dentures: Two rows of artificial ivories that may be removed periodically to frighten one's grandchildren or provide accompaniment to Spanish music.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Shallowness: The root cause of chronic good health, high school popularity, appearance on the fiction bestseller lists, and gainful employment on local tv news broadcasts.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Fiber: Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Age Definitions Food/Drink Health Old

Neighbors: The strangers who live next door.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions People

Quality of Life: What an industrialized nation is said to offer when enough of its citizens are suffering from terminal stress.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Urinal: The one place where all men are peers.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Men

Repressed: Sitting on one’s inner demon to keep it decorously immobilized, as practiced by lifelong Presbyterians or anyone who attempts to exchange pleasantries with a tyrannical boss.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Star: A performer who makes more than his or her agent.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Funeral Home: a stately manse occupied by transients who continually receive visitors but lack the energy and inclination to entertain them.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions