Author Rob Vaux | Just-One-Liners.com

Author: Rob Vaux

I’d give real money to see the perpetrators of Chicago torn apart by dingoes.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism Chicago

Progressing from nowhere to nothing and leaving only a greasy taste in the mouth as a reward.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Conan the Barbarian”

Whew! That was close: something almost happened there for a minute.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2”

Not even Ian McKellan can bring it to life… and when Ian McKellan throws in the towel, you know the difficulties are too large to fix.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism The Da Vinci Code

Rarely has the phrase "going through the motions" felt more fitting.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Miscellaneous “R.I.P.D.”

That isn’t brimstone we’re smelling on Ghost Rider. It’s something else.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Ghost Rider”

Real-life military trainers – regardless of gender – never make you say, ‘Wow you’re hot!’ They make you say, ‘I’ll do whatever you want, please don’t hurt me.’

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Annapolis”

A tedious, astonishingly irritating march through scene after scene of quasi-Jungian horse flop.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Lady in the Water”

It's flawless in its flaws, without a single redeeming element to obscure its idealized awfulness.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Nutcracker in 3D”

Memoirs of a Geisha builds a beautiful garden, then runs an interstate through it to let more people in.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Memoirs of a Geisha”

At least it’s not in 3D.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “The Hangover Part II”

As a routine thriller Firewall is barely functional, but as a waste of talent, it’s positively amazing.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Firewall”

Robbing casinos? Shit, these guys should be in charge of Katrina relief!

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Ocean’s Thirteen”

Stop for a moment and ponder just how stupid it is to blow the ending of your movie in the title.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn”

It's a car movie made by people who couldn't find reverse in a Volkswagen; a puzzle box thriller assembled by the functionally insane.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Getaway”

You could do worse… by which I mean you couldn't possibly do worse.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Hercules”

You can actually hear the writers pulling ideas out of their butts and flinging them willy-nilly at the screen.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian”

Only someone so smart could make a movie this stupid.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “My Soul to Take” Writer/director Wes Craven

House of Wax is cheap, dirty entertainment, and it knows it.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “House of Wax”

Oh come on. Like you couldn’t smell this turkey rotting from miles away.

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism “The Scorpion King”

God help us, there’s going to be a director’s cut, isn’t there?

Rob Vaux

writer, editor & film reviewer

Reviews/Criticism Review of “Eragon”

Quotes and One Liners

humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more

Categories

Additional Categories

Oops...

Some Popular Authors

Author: Rob Vaux

I’d give real money to see the perpetrators of Chicago torn apart by dingoes.

Progressing from nowhere to nothing and leaving only a greasy taste in the mouth as a reward.

Whew! That was close: something almost happened there for a minute.

Not even Ian McKellan can bring it to life… and when Ian McKellan throws in the towel, you know the difficulties are too large to fix.

Rarely has the phrase "going through the motions" felt more fitting.

That isn’t brimstone we’re smelling on Ghost Rider. It’s something else.

Real-life military trainers – regardless of gender – never make you say, ‘Wow you’re hot!’ They make you say, ‘I’ll do whatever you want, please don’t hurt me.’

A tedious, astonishingly irritating march through scene after scene of quasi-Jungian horse flop.

It's flawless in its flaws, without a single redeeming element to obscure its idealized awfulness.

Memoirs of a Geisha builds a beautiful garden, then runs an interstate through it to let more people in.

At least it’s not in 3D.

As a routine thriller Firewall is barely functional, but as a waste of talent, it’s positively amazing.

Robbing casinos? Shit, these guys should be in charge of Katrina relief!

Stop for a moment and ponder just how stupid it is to blow the ending of your movie in the title.

It's a car movie made by people who couldn't find reverse in a Volkswagen; a puzzle box thriller assembled by the functionally insane.

You could do worse… by which I mean you couldn't possibly do worse.

You can actually hear the writers pulling ideas out of their butts and flinging them willy-nilly at the screen.

Only someone so smart could make a movie this stupid.

House of Wax is cheap, dirty entertainment, and it knows it.

Oh come on. Like you couldn’t smell this turkey rotting from miles away.

God help us, there’s going to be a director’s cut, isn’t there?