Author: Roseanne Barr Page 2
Birth control that really works – every night before we go to bed we spend an hour with our kids.
(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
People say to me, “You’re not feminine;” well, they can just suck my d**k.
(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
To expect life to treat you good is as foolish as hoping a bull won’t hit you because you are a vegetarian.
(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I’ve done my job.
(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Women are cursed, and men are the proof.
(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
You may marry the man of your dreams, ladies, but fourteen years later you're married to a couch that burps.
(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.
(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer