Author Tina Fey | Just-One-Liners.com

Author: Tina Fey

Al Qaeda on Friday released a statement confirming the death of Osama Bin Laden. They also announced that, as a result, Monday will be a half-day.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

President Bush and the Indian prime minister agreed Thursday on a landmark nuclear energy agreement in which the U.S. would share its nuclear know-how and fuel with India. And, in exchange, India would take all our jobs.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

Places TV/Movie Quotes India

Kenneth: Your landlord called and he says it's not the toilet, it's you.
Liz: That's his opinion.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes As Liz Lemon in “30 Rock”

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger’s popularity has been slipping in recent months as residents slowly begin to realize they elected Arnold Schwarzenegger to be their governor.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes Arnold Schwarzenegger From Weekend Update on “Saturday Night Live”

Gay people don’t actually try to convert people… that’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

People Gays Jehovah's Witnesses

I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society…unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

Things Photoshop

According to Secret Service logs, convicted lobbyist Jack Abramoff was at the White House only two times in the past fives years; of course, the real question is: was it the same two times that President Bush was there?

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes

It was reported that Guy Ritchie has cast his wife Madonna in a small walk-on role in his new movie, Revolver… Madonna will play the part of the woman who ruins the film.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

Acting Entertainment Insults Madonna

A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature; plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

Health Babies Rectal thermometers Temperature

Jack: We are lovers.
Liz: That word bums me out unless it’s between the words “meat” and “pizza”.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

Miscellaneous As Liz Lemon in “30 Rock”

According to a new poll, Democrats are favoring Hillary Clinton for the Democratic presidential nominee for 2008; Democrats say they are looking for a fresh and exciting new way to get their asses handed to them.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes From Weekend Update on “Saturday Night Live” Hillary Clinton

Bossypants

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

Book Titles

Jack: We are lovers.
Liz: That word bums me out unless it’s between the words “meat” and “pizza”.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes As Liz Lemon in “30 Rock”

A Senate committee on Thursday approved a constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage, apparently forgetting that our forefathers wore wigs and satin Capri pants.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes

South Dakota Gov. Mike Rounds on Monday signed legislation banning almost all abortions in the state; as a result, South Dakota is changing its motto from ‘Under God, the People Rule’ to ‘You should have thought of that before prom.’

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes

If convicted [Scooter] Libby could face the following penalties: obstruction of justice: 10 years in prison; making false statements: 5 years; perjury: 4 years; going to jail with the name Scooter: priceless.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes From Weekend Update on “Saturday Night Live” Scooter Libby

Tracy: So what’s your religion, Liz Lemon?
Liz: I pretty much do whatever Oprah tells me to do.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes As Liz Lemon in “30 Rock” Oprah

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

Children Family From 'A Mother's Prayer for Her Child'

Last week, Hurricane Wilma grew into the strongest storm ever recorded in the Atlantic, with sustained winds at 175 miles per hour… or, as it’s called around FEMA, ‘Casual Friday’.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes From Weekend Update on “Saturday Night Live”

In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students… there were no survivors.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

Arms Conflict Guns NRA

If Bush’s [overall approval ratings] don’t improve, he could become the first president held back and forced to repeat his presidency.

Tina Fey

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer

TV/Movie Quotes George W. Bush

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Author: Tina Fey

Al Qaeda on Friday released a statement confirming the death of Osama Bin Laden. They also announced that, as a result, Monday will be a half-day.

President Bush and the Indian prime minister agreed Thursday on a landmark nuclear energy agreement in which the U.S. would share its nuclear know-how and fuel with India. And, in exchange, India would take all our jobs.

Kenneth: Your landlord called and he says it's not the toilet, it's you.
Liz: That's his opinion.

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger’s popularity has been slipping in recent months as residents slowly begin to realize they elected Arnold Schwarzenegger to be their governor.

Gay people don’t actually try to convert people… that’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.

I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society…unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool.

According to Secret Service logs, convicted lobbyist Jack Abramoff was at the White House only two times in the past fives years; of course, the real question is: was it the same two times that President Bush was there?

It was reported that Guy Ritchie has cast his wife Madonna in a small walk-on role in his new movie, Revolver… Madonna will play the part of the woman who ruins the film.

A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature; plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss.

Jack: We are lovers.
Liz: That word bums me out unless it’s between the words “meat” and “pizza”.

According to a new poll, Democrats are favoring Hillary Clinton for the Democratic presidential nominee for 2008; Democrats say they are looking for a fresh and exciting new way to get their asses handed to them.

Bossypants

Jack: We are lovers.
Liz: That word bums me out unless it’s between the words “meat” and “pizza”.

A Senate committee on Thursday approved a constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage, apparently forgetting that our forefathers wore wigs and satin Capri pants.

South Dakota Gov. Mike Rounds on Monday signed legislation banning almost all abortions in the state; as a result, South Dakota is changing its motto from ‘Under God, the People Rule’ to ‘You should have thought of that before prom.’

If convicted [Scooter] Libby could face the following penalties: obstruction of justice: 10 years in prison; making false statements: 5 years; perjury: 4 years; going to jail with the name Scooter: priceless.

Tracy: So what’s your religion, Liz Lemon?
Liz: I pretty much do whatever Oprah tells me to do.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Last week, Hurricane Wilma grew into the strongest storm ever recorded in the Atlantic, with sustained winds at 175 miles per hour… or, as it’s called around FEMA, ‘Casual Friday’.

In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students… there were no survivors.

If Bush’s [overall approval ratings] don’t improve, he could become the first president held back and forced to repeat his presidency.