Author: Tina Fey Page 2

Jack: We are lovers.

Liz: That word bums me out unless it’s between the words “meat” and “pizza”.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

South Dakota Gov. Mike Rounds on Monday signed legislation banning almost all abortions in the state; as a result, South Dakota is changing its motto from ‘Under God, the People Rule’ to ‘You should have thought of that before prom.’

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

When Martha Stewart reported to prison yesterday, she was subjected to an invasive strip search that included a squat and cough, during which she laid two perfect blue speckled eggs.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

I haven’t seen this many white people in tuxedos since the Titanic.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Appearance Clothing TV/Movie Quotes

I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society…unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Things

Kenneth: Your landlord called and he says it's not the toilet, it's you.

Liz: That's his opinion.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

In the wake of a successful Iraqi elections President Bush’s job approval rating has jumped up to 57% or, as high school teachers call it, an ‘F’.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Miscellaneous

According to Secret Service logs, convicted lobbyist Jack Abramoff was at the White House only two times in the past fives years; of course, the real question is: was it the same two times that President Bush was there?

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Children Family

Bossypants

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Book Titles