Author: Woody Allen Page 8

I was nauseous and tingly all over… I was either in love or I had smallpox.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Emotions Health Love

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Characteristics Education

There are two types of people in this world, good and bad; the good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
People Situations Sleep

Drew Barrymore sings so badly, deaf people refuse to watch her lips move.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Reviews/Criticism

Hey, don’t knock masturbation. It’s sex with someone I love.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Sex TV/Movie Quotes

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people: the good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Characteristics Situations Sleep

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Future Life Time

God is silent; now if only man would shut up.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Beliefs God People

I was the best I ever had.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
People Self Sex

[After a fight] Yeah, I’m fine. I snapped my chin down onto some guy’s fist and hit another one in the knee with my nose.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Conflict Fights TV/Movie Quotes

Look. Last night you felt like a woman and I felt like a man… and that's the kind of thing those people do.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Sex TV/Movie Quotes

It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death Intelligence

I hate reality… but nevertheless, it’s still the only place to get a good steak.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Eating Food/Drink Life

Sex is better than talk… talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Communication Conversation Sex Speech

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on Saturday and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on Saturday.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Beliefs Religion

I have an intense desire to return to the womb… anybody's.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Situations

The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Eating Food/Drink