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Send ‘im’ down a piano, see if ‘e can play that!

Stephen Gascoigne (1878 – 1942) Australian sports fan & heckler

Those are the only balls you've touched all day!

Stephen Gascoigne (1878 – 1942) Australian sports fan & heckler

Sports Cricket To an English batsman adjusting his (athletic cup)

Oi, leave our flies alone, Jardine. They’re the only friends you’ve got here.

Stephen Gascoigne (1878 – 1942) Australian sports fan & heckler

Sports Cricket To fly-swatting English cricket captain Douglas Jardine

I wish you were a statue and I were a pigeon.

Stephen Gascoigne (1878 – 1942) Australian sports fan & heckler