Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Label
Remove plastic before eating.
Label
Signs
Wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack
For lifting purposes only.
Label
Signs
Box for a car jack
Shake well and buy often
Label
Signs
Silk Soy Milk
Not intended for highway use.
Label
Signs
On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow
Do not put lit candles on phone.
Label
Signs
On the instructions for a cordless phone
Warning: Do not drive with sunshade in place. Remove from windshield before starting ignition.
Label
Signs
Auto-Shade Windshield Visor
Warning: May cause Drowsiness
Label
Signs
On a bottle of sleeping pills
With Xhilaration® There are No Rules. Whether you choose to go crazy or dress to thrill. Make a statement. Make a scene. Wear what you want and it won’t be wrong.
Label
Signs
Tag on clothing for 18-month-old girls
For best results, remove cap.
Label
Signs
Nabisco Easy Cheese
Fold Top Down. Cross Legs. Collapse.
Label
Signs
Instructions inside a portable voting booth
For use by trained personnel only.
Label
Signs
On a can of air freshener
Do not drive cars in ocean.
Label
Signs
Small print from car commercial which shows a car in the ocean
Instructional video on hooking up VCR included.
Label
Signs
On a VCR box
Cannot be made non-poisonous.
Label
Signs
On the back of a can of de-icing windshield fluid
Kills all kinds of insects… Warning: this product is harmful to bees.
Label
Signs
On an can of insecticide
These ear plugs are nontoxic, but may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe
Label
Signs
On earplugs
First Alert Smoke Alarm with Silence Feature…
Label
Signs
Do not throw baby out with bath water.
Label
Signs
On an infant's bathtub
Safe to use around pets and children, although it is not recommended that either be permitted to drink from toilet.
Label
Signs
On Bowl Fresh toilet cleaner package
Suitable for outdoor use.
Label
Signs
On a rain gauge
Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants.
Label
Signs
On the packaging for a wristwatch
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