Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Tuesday, April 15, 2025
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Author: Label
Use the Fuzzy End!
Label
Signs
On complimentary toothbrushes given by dentists
For Pain and Stomach Upset – do not use if pouch is opened
Label
Signs
On a pill package
Do Not Stand Up Through the Sun Roof While Driving or While Closing It
Label
Signs
In a Toyota owners manual
Do not place this product into any electronic equipment.
Label
Signs
Case of a chocolate CD in a gift basket
Do not wear for sumo wrestling.
Label
Signs
From a set of washing instructions
Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.
Label
Signs
On a pair of shin guards made for bicyclists
Not to be Used for the Other Use
Label
Signs
Translations
On a Japanese food processor
Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death.
Label
Signs
Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle
Please store in the cold section of the refrigerator.
Label
Signs
On a bag of fresh grapes in Australia
The appliance is switched on by setting the on/off switch to the 'on' position.
Label
Signs
On an Espresso Kettle
These ear plugs are nontoxic, but may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe
Label
Signs
On earplugs
Some assembly required.
Label
Signs
On a 500-piece puzzle
Caution: Shoots rubber bands.
Label
Signs
On a product called ‘Rubber Band Shooter’
Payment is due by the due date.
Label
Signs
On a credit card statement
Do not put lit candles on phone.
Label
Signs
On the instructions for a cordless phone
Do not throw baby out with bath water.
Label
Signs
Infant's bathtub
You cannot save the world!
Label
Signs
On a Power Puff® Girls costume
Directions: Tear open packet and use.
Label
Signs
On a Wet-Nap package
The logo, "Tastes so good this box never closes"
Label
Signs
Located just underneath another announcement – To close: place tab here.
On a box of Frosted Cheerios
Do Not Rattle Playfully at the Shutter Button
Label
Signs
In the instruction manual for a Canon camera
Theft of this container is a crime.
Label
Signs
On a milk crate
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