Keyword: Advice

I have a bit of advice for hungry young comedians – eat something.

(1921 – 1984) British comedian & magician
Beliefs Opinion

Advice is like castor oil, easy to give, but dreadful to take.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Beliefs Characteristics Opinion

Among the many remedies that won’t cure a cold, the most common is advice.

Beliefs Health

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

Age Intelligence Old Young

If you want to get rid of somebody, just tell him something for his own good.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Beliefs Opinion

If I needed advice from my caddie, he'd be hitting the shots and I'd be carrying the bag.

American professional golfer
Golf Sports

If people wanted your unsolicited advice, they’d ask for it.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Beliefs Opinion

The worst waste of breath, next to playing a saxophone, is advising a son.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Beliefs Children Family Opinion

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it is the stupid ones who need all the advice.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Fools Intelligence Wisdom

The best time to give advice to your children is while they’re still young enough to believe you know what you’re talking about.

Beliefs Children Family Intelligence Opinion

 If you can tell the difference between good advice and bad advice, you don't need advice.

Murphy’s Laws

For sincere advice and the correct time, call any number at random at 3:00 a.m.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Activities Sleep Time

The trouble with giving advice is that people want to repay you.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Beliefs

You’ll always find some Eskimo ready to instruct the Congolese on how to cope with heat waves.

(1909 – 1966) Polish poet, writer & aphorist
Beliefs Opinion

Advice: Something which we give by the bushel but take by the grain.

Definitions

If it’s free, it’s advice; if you pay for it, it’s counseling; if you can use either one, it’s a miracle.

(1895 – 1968) Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Beliefs Opinion

I intended to give you some advice but now I remember how much is left over from last year unused.

(1814 – 1869) American humorist
Beliefs Opinion

If Columbus had had an advisory committee he would probably still be at the dock.

(1908 – 1990) American statesman, jurist & attorney
Beliefs Opinion People

Here's some advice for you guys: never hire a clown named Molesto.

stand-up comedian
Beliefs

When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and give it to him.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Beliefs Opinion

The one prediction that never comes true is, “You’ll thank me for telling you this.”

(1938 – ) journalist, columnist (Miss Manners)
Beliefs Opinion