Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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As Maude Findlay in “Maude”
Maude: [Holding up her high school cheerleading sweater, which has an “M” on the front] I can remember when the “M” covered my whole chest.Walter: Now, you have enough room to spell out “Massachusetts Institute of Technology”.
Bea Arthur
(1922 – 2009) American actress & singer
TV/Movie Quotes
As Maude Findlay in “Maude”
Maude: When he says wife, he means possession.
Walter: So what, Maude? You told me a hundred times you want to be possessed.
Maude: Walter Findlay, I never said that standing up and you know it.
Bea Arthur
(1922 – 2009) American actress & singer
TV/Movie Quotes
As Maude Findlay in “Maude”
Dr. Arthur Harmon: [Looking at Maude’s black eye] If the
Our Gang
” comedies ever come back, you could be the dog.Maude: And if Mister Ed ever comes back, there’d be a part for you. I’m not talking about the part that talks.
Bea Arthur
(1922 – 2009) American actress & singer
TV/Movie Quotes
As Maude Findlay in “Maude”
Dr. Arthur Harmon: No offense Maudie, but I wouldn’t touch you with a ten-foot pole.Maude: No offense Arthur, but that’s the only way you’d
ever
touch me.
Bea Arthur
(1922 – 2009) American actress & singer
TV/Movie Quotes
As Maude Findlay in “Maude”
Maude Findlay: Walter, if you don’t want my daughter and my only grandchild living here with us just tell me.
Walter Findlay: And…?
Maude: And I’ll rip your heart out.
Bea Arthur
(1922 – 2009) American actress & singer
TV/Movie Quotes
As Maude Findlay in “Maude”