Keyword: Catholicism

We have a whole religion based on a woman who really stuck to her story.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality

My parents are Catholic, which means that they love Jesus and liquor and I don't think there's anything more Mexican than that.

(1974 – ) American stand-up comedian

There were many reasons we broke up; there was a religious difference: I'm a Catholic, and she's the devil.

American actor & comedian

I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.

(1946 – ) filmmaker, actor & writer

Catholics don't get divorced; they stay together through anger and hatred and festering misery, just like God intended.

(1953 – ) American comedian & actor

The Catholics have an interesting view of sex; it is disgusting, amoral and filthy and you should save it for one you love.

(1957 – ) American actor, comedian & filmmaker

My mom’s Jewish and my dad’s Irish Catholic alcoholic, so I whine on the inside.

stand-up comedian, actor, writer & producer

My dad was Catholic, my mom was Baptist — which was great 'cause at church we got bread and chicken.

American comedian

Basically, the Catholic religion is 'If it feels good – stop.’

American actor & comedian

My mom brought us to mass every Sunday – short for ‘massive head trauma’ that you get from your mother punching you in your little nine-year-old head every minute because you can’t sit still for anything that’s boring.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor