Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Keyword:
Criticism
(Page 2)
When your head is in the bear's mouth, it is not the time to be smacking him on the nose.
Anonymous
Communication
Problems
Criticism
Trouble
America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between.
Oscar Wilde
(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
America
Places
Barbarism
Civilization
Criticism
Decadence
A drama critic is a man who leaves no turn unstoned.
George Bernard Shaw
(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Communication
Entertainment
Wordplay
Criticism
A critic is a bunch of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste.
Whitney Balliett
(1926 – 2007) American jazz critic & book reviewer
Communication
Death
Occupations
Work
Criticism
Critics
Yankees' owner George Steinbrenner is a first-and-ten capitalist in a bunt-and-run world.
Thomas Boswell
American sportswriter
Baseball
Communication
Sports
Criticism
George Steinbrenner
Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
Bill Maher
(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Men
People
Women
Criticism
English painter & sculptor Frederic Leighton to James McNeill Whistler: My dear Whistler, you leave your pictures in such a sketchy, unfinished state. Why don't you ever finish them?
Whistler’s reply: My dear Leighton, why do you ever begin yours?
James McNeill Whistler
(1834 – 1903) American-born, British-based artist
Communication
Entertainment
Insults
Criticism
Painting
For God's sake, go and tell that young man to take that Rockingham tea service out of his tights.
Noel Coward
(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Entertainment
Insults
Coward said to the choreographer when a male dancer in one of his plays forgot to wear the proper support
Criticism
Theater
My handwriting looks as if a swarm of ants, escaping from an ink bottle, had walked over a sheet of paper without wiping their legs.
Reverend Sydney Smith
(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Communication
People
Reading/Writing
Self
Criticism
I hope they notice the mistletoe tied to my coattails as I leave town.
Abe Lemons
(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Communication
Criticism
Mistletoe
If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.
Art Buchwald
(1925 – 2007) humorist & columnist
Communication
Government
Criticism
Establishment
If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read "President Can't Swim.”
Lyndon Johnson
(1908 – 1973) 36th U.S. president
Communication
(also Margaret Thatcher)
Criticism
Potomac River
You know, you can’t please all the people all the time… and last night, all those people were at my show.
Mitch Hedberg
(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics
Entertainment
People
Criticism
Please
Show
This sign says “IMPROV,” but I had a bad set on Friday night, so yesterday they put an “E” on the end of it.
Mitch Hedberg
(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Communication
Language
Comedy
Criticism
One could not even dignify him with the name of a stuffed shirt; he was simply a hole on the air.
George Orwell
Eric Arthur Blair (1903 – 50) English author & journalist
Communication
Insults
Criticism
On politician Stanley Baldwin
The quality of debate [in the House of Lords] is pretty high – and it is, I think, good evidence of life after death.
Rev. Donald Soper
(1903 – 1998) English clergyman
Communication
Speech
Criticism
Debate
The House of Lords
A good review is considered nepotism; a bad one professional jealousy.
Armitstead's Law of Book Reviewing
Communication
Murphy’s Laws
Opinion
Criticism
It's a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn't want to hear.
Dick Cavett
(1936 – ) television talk show host
Communication
Individuals
People
Criticism
Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance or a stranger.
Franklin Jones
(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Beliefs
Opinion
Criticism
Every English poet should master the rules of grammar before he attempts to bend or break them.
Robert Graves
(1895 – 1985) British author & classical scholar
Communication
Reading/Writing
Criticism
Grammar
Poets
I never met anybody who said when they were a kid, “I wanna grow up and be a critic.”
Richard Pryor
(1940 – 2005) comedian & movie actor
Communication
Occupations
Work
Aspirations
Criticism
Critics
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