Keyword: Homosexuals

It’s better to be black than gay because when you’re black you don’t have to tell your mother.

comedian, composer & lyricist
Appearance Characteristics Mothers

Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.

(1965 – ) comedian, actor, screenwriter, television producer & director
Marriage People

They’re the only couples you’ll ever find poking around for ceramics and candle holders in the winery gift shop and both parties really want to be there.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
People

You could move.

(1918 – ) American advice columnist
People

A dreamcatcher works, if your dream is to be gay.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Things

There hasn’t been a more effeminate Jew in the closet since Anne Frank.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
Beliefs Religion

We had gay burglars the other night; they broke in and rearranged the furniture.

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor
Situations

If Michaelangelo had been a heterosexual, the Sistine Chapel would have been painted basic white and with a roller.

1944) is an American writer & screenwriter
Characteristics Entertainment

I'm not a lesbian; I can't even do improv.

(1958 – ) American actress & stand-up comedian
Characteristics Sex

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war… just a greater emphasis on military apparel.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Clothing Conflict Government Military War

We had our family tree done… turns out I'm a quarter gay on my father's side.

(1966 – ) American actor, musician & comedian
Relationships

If you're a guy, you're wearing a fanny pack, the only thing inside there's, like, a butt plug and Streisand tickets.

stand-up comedian, writer & actor
People Things

It’s a lot easier being black than gay; at least if you’re black you don’t have to tell.

American comedian & motivational speaker
People

My mother married a very good man… and she is not at all keen on my doing the same.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Marriage

Martina was so far in the closet she was in danger of being a garment bag.

1944) is an American writer & screenwriter
People Sex

Recruiter: Now, are either of you homosexuals?

John Winger: [John and Russell look at each other] You mean, like, flaming…

(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

My cousin is gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Places Sex

Checkers taught me that a King is a man with another man on top of him, but life taught me that that's actually called a Queen.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Activities Games

Homosexuality is God’s way of ensuring that the truly gifted aren’t burdened with children.

comedian, composer & lyricist
Characteristics Children Intelligence People

The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love heterosexuals, it’s just that they need more supervision.

(1959 – ) Australian writer & television producer
People Sex

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men… there is a three year waiting list.

(1951 – ) Soviet-American comedian
Places